Have you ever defined your own writing success in economic terms? Have you ever felt jealous of those who seemed more prolific and better compensated? How did you come to grips with those feelings?
Cara Holman wrote:
At the tender young age of twenty, armed with a technical degree from a university with name recognition, I landed a job that paid more than I have ever earned since. Over the years, I have ruefully watched my financial contribution to our family's assets plummet, as I subsequently became in turn, a full-time graduate student, a stay-at-home mom and volunteer, and finally a freelance writer. At least when I volunteered, I could count on a steady stream of compensation in the form of thank you gifts such as refrigerator magnets, gift certificates, and home baked goodies. At the moment, my writing proceeds are rather hit or miss.
Thankfully, I have never doubted that what I do is important, and learned early on not to use earning power as a measure of success. Had I done so, my sense of self-esteem would have been completely eroded by now. While it would be lovely to be liberally compensated for my writings with more regularity, I have learned to make do without.
My attitude about the value of money has largely been shaped by the fairy tales I so voraciously read as a child. If they were to be believed (and I believed them), it is better to be poor, but honest than corrupted by the lure of money. Poor, but honest, at least as regards my writing life, seems to be what I am destined to remain for the moment, as compensation is not the determining factor in where I submit my writings.
I must admit to experiencing an emotion suspiciously akin to envy occasionally, when I discover other writers who possess a seemingly natural gift for words. Why can't I write like that is the thought that runs through my mind at these times. It is another story altogether, however, when I see authors that crank out formulaic and bland books year after year, earning a disproportionately large income and an assured spot for their books on the shelves of bookstores and libraries. This offends my sense of fairness.
As my father often asked rhetorically, though, "Who said life is fair?" Dad's answer to the intrinsically inequitable nature of life was simply to encourage us to seek out our own strengths, to do our personal best, and to work hard. He never lost any sleep over factors that were beyond his control, and I have learned to follow his example. I concentrate now on writing to the best of my ability and don't worry so much about external measures of success.
Fairy tale endings can happen, and perhaps one day, more widespread recognition and adequate compensation for my writing efforts will come my way. A girl can dream. For now, just being able to indulge in my lifelong passion for writing full time sure feels like success to me!
Cara Holman can be reached at cara(dot)holman(at)gmail(dot)com.
The Sophia Institute
with Stephanie Hunt (LM columnist of The Great Green Room)
Thursday, February 26, 2009 - 7:00PM
The Studio, 297 East Bay Street
There’s nothing like parenting to push you to the edge of joy and frustration, exhilaration and exhaustion, hope and fear. It requires confronting the essential questions. Join us to consider parenting as a spiritual practice, exploring how we can mindfully, authentically and consciously honor the work of soul-shaping, for us and our kids.
A panel discussion led by Stephanie Hunt, a mother of three, writer and Vanderbilt Divinity School graduate.
The editors of Dads in Academia: Male Voices In and Out of the Ivory Tower invite contributions for an interdisciplinary collection of creative nonfiction essays on the
rewards and challenges of being both a father and an academic. Much
recent discussion about the juxtaposition of parenthood and the
academy has focused on the difficulties that female professors face
when they choose to become mothers. Books like Mama, PhD, edited by Caroline Grant and Elrena Evans, depict the oftentimes bleak prospects of merging the two endeavors. This collection welcomes the masculine voice into this lively and provocative dialogue. Further, Dads in Academia creates a space for male professors to describe their own experiences of balancing the demands and desires of two worlds that have changed notably throughout the past few decades: fatherhood and academia.
We encourage contributors to consider the changing cultural
perceptions, representations, and expectations associated with
fatherhood, and to explore the impact of such changes on their
identities as teachers and scholars. Increasingly, fathers are taking on a more intense role with regard to child-rearing than ever before.
How do today’s male academics view their participation in the
parenting process? How is this changing the nature of the job? Has
the evolving role of the father in contemporary society changed the
job itself?
We also welcome essays that focus on how the evolution of fatherhood
is changing the face of academia. Have we seen any concrete changes
on college campuses to encourage the “professor as interactive father” schemata? What is the climate like for male professors who “want it all”? Are they able to balance fatherhood and the road to tenure? What gives?
Editors:
Mary Ruth Marotte, Ph.D. is an Assistant Professor of English and the Director of Graduate Studies in English at the University of Central Arkansas, where she specializes in women’s studies and critical theory. Her book, Captive Bodies: American Women Writers Redefine Pregnancy and Childbirth, was released by Demeter Press in October 2008. She lives in Conway, AR with her husband and three children.
Paige Martin Reynolds, Ph.D. is an Assistant
Professor of English at the University of Central Arkansas. Her
specializations include Shakespeare, British Renaissance Drama,
Performance Studies, and Elizabeth I. She has written articles
published or forthcoming in SEL: Studies in English Literature,
1500-1900, ANQ: American Notes and Queries, and 1650-1850: Ideas,
Aesthetics, and Inquiries in the Early Modern Era. She lives in
Little Rock, AR with her husband and daughter.
Deadline: March 1, 2009
Length: 1,500 to 4,000 words.
Format: Essays must be typed, double-spaced, and paginated. Please
include your name, address, phone number, e-mail address, and a short bio on the last page.
Contact: Mary Ruth Marotte at mrmarotte AT hotmail DOT com for more
information
Stories that celebrate the women who gave us everything
While it’s true that each of us has “only one mother the wide world over,” there are many different ways to be a mother and many different forms and flavors of mother-child relationships. And in this Cup of Comfort anthology we want to capture it all—with personal stories about a wide range of mothering and mother-child experiences, including those that test your mettle as well as those that enrich your life. The book will include stories written both by mothers and about mothers (by their adult children, spouse, own mother). Any topic and tone goes, as long as it’s meaningful to mothers and suitable for Cup of Comfort. Whether a story is endearing or entertaining, inspiring or insightful, humorous or heartwarming, poignant or empowering, or all of the above, it must be uplifting and authentic. And most should be about living mothers/children. Although a story may be about a deceased mother (or a deceased child, if written by the mother), it should focus on her life, not on her death. Narrative essays preferred. Story length: 1000–2000 words.
Submission Deadline: May 15, 2009
Finalist Notification: June 1, 2009
New from our friend and fellow mother-writer Kate Hopper:
March 19 - May 21 (10 weeks)
Whether you are a new mom or a veteran, whether you gave birth to or adopted your child, in this online class you'll learn how to take birth and motherhood stories and turn them into art. Weekly lectures, reading assignments and writing exercises will focus on telling details, character development, emotional distance, strengthening your reflective voice, and revision. You can expect to generate two to three creative nonfiction pieces, and you will have an opportunity to revise and expand one of these into a longer piece. You will receive feedback from your peers and from the instructor through online workshops.
This class is open to writers of all ability levels! Join this online community of mothers who are interested in writing about motherhood!
Cost is $250. Class size is limited. Please contact katehopper [at] msn.com if you have any questions about the class or would like to register.
What students are saying about Kate's classes:
"Kate is warm, funny and full of great ideas to help writers of every level. I loved her organized syllabus, the breadth of the essays/passages she had us read outside of class, the free-flowing discussions, and the homework assignments that generated unexpected results in my own writing. Kate creates a classroom that encourages students to open up and share their stories, both in the form of conversation and the written word. I was truly delighted by Mother Words. My writing went deeper than I expected, and I felt really inspired by the quality of the work Kate helped me produce." –E
"Kate is a gifted and lively teacher, coach, and guide. She's got a knack for finding the creative threads in a piece, then helping students weave them together to create something beautiful. I always felt supported and encouraged in her class-which is why I took it three times!" –P
"Kate has a way of reading your writing for what it truly is and wants to become. In this way she infuses new excitement into your work and stretches you as a writer in new ways." –K
"Our classroom quickly became a community of mothers writing about every range of experience in motherhood, from infertility to SIDS. Kate's steady presence, her preparation of selected readings designed to prompt memory as well as writerly analysis, and her gentle critical responses to our work fostered an environment that nurtured creativity, experimentation, truth-telling. Several students were repeating the class for the third time, learning new approaches and diving deeper into their own stories of motherhood. Yes, Kate Hopper IS that good!" –G
About Kate:
Kate Hopper received her MFA in creative writing from the University of Minnesota. She has been the recipient of a Fulbright Scholarship to Costa Rica, a Gesell summer residency at the Anderson Center in Red Wing, and a 2008 MN State Arts Board Artist Initiative Grant. Her writing has appeared in Minnesota Parent, Preemie Magazine, Mamazine, MotherVerse, the StarTribune and nytimes.com. She is completing her first book, a memoir about learning to live with uncertainty, which tells the story of her daughter's premature birth. She has taught at the University of Minnesota and Jack Pine Writers' Bloc and currently teaches at the Loft Literary Center in Minneapolis. She writes about reading, writing, teaching and motherhood on her blog, Mother Words: Mothers Who Write.
For more information about Kate, visit www.katehopper.com.
The following is information about an upcoming conference that the Barnard Center for Research on Women is hosting on February 28.
The conference, entitled "The Politics of Reproduction: New Technologies of Life," will take up many of the questions that surround the increasing use of assisted reproductive technologies and adoption to build families. Propelled by changes in familial form, such as lesbian, gay, and transgendered parents and families; delays in childbearing; and childrearing in second or third marriages, the use of ART and transnational adoption is growing, and so are the questions that accompany the use of these new ways of creating families. For instance, do these new technologies place women and children at risk? How should we respond ethically to the ability of these technologies to test for genetic illnesses? How can we ensure that marginalized individuals, for example, people with disabilities, women of color, and low-income women, have equal access to these new technologies and adoption practices? And, similarly, how do we ensure that transnational surrogacy and adoption practices are not exploitative?
A full list of participants and registration information can be found on this website: http://www.barnard.edu/bcrw/scholarandfeminist/2009/index.htm.
email class with Sage Cohen starts March 11
Have you always wanted to write a poem but didn’t know how to begin? Maybe you’re already writing poetry and want to connect with your muse more often or brush up on your poetic prowess? Poetry for the People takes poetry off of its academic pedestal, making it accessible and enjoyable for everyone.
Facilitated by award-winning poet Sage Cohen, Poetry for the People will introduce new ways of expressing yourself in poetry and appreciating the poetry you read. Each week’s lesson will include a mix of:
* Inspiration: sample, published poems that illustrate the topic of the week
* Craft tips: simple instruction about image, sound, rhythm, metaphor, etc.
* Exercises: process and content prompts to get you writing
* Publication ideas: tips about how and where to submit your work for publication
You’ll be inspired (but not required) to write a poem a day!
Get all the details and register here:
Writing The Life Poetic
Please join Reviews editor and former columnist (Mama in the Middle) Sybil Lockhart, who will be appearing on Bay Area television and appearing in local bookstores in February.
Friday, February 6, 2009 at 3pm
“View from the Bay”
Channel 7 KGO TV
watch Sybil's appearance here!
Sunday, February 8 at 2 pm
Book Passage Bookstore in Corte Madera
51 Tamal Vista Blvd.
Corte Madera, CA
(415) 927-0960
(800) 999-7909
Tuesday, February 24 at 7 pm
Barnes & Noble El Cerrito Plaza
6060 El Cerrito Plaza
El Cerrito, CA 94530
(510)524-0087
Saturday, February 28 at 1:30 pm
Copperfield’s Books
2316 Montgomery Drive
Santa Rosa, CA 95404
707-578-8938
Literary Reflections is pleased to present our featured writing prompt response from January. We asked, "Have you ever felt torn between the demands of work and domesticity and your personal need to create and write? What mountain did you have to climb to pass from a state of domestic certitude to the sometimes frightening, frequently challenging state of being a writer?"
As promised, here is the second writing prompt essay we chose for January's Selected Short.
Paula Kiger wrote:
“Can you look at this letter?”
“Would you mind taking a look at my article?”
Many of my work responsibilities leave me with an aftertaste of insecurity. Writing-related tasks are minuscule parts of my job; but, I don’t feel hesitant when I start them. When I submit the completed product, I am confident that my work has helped an enrollee comprehend our complicated program, or perhaps has enticed a legislator to protect our vulnerable budget.
I can see the problems in a piece of text the way some people can play piano by ear. I just intuitively know how to excise unnecessary verbiage and rearrange words to flow better.
I can also write. People say, “even your routine emails have a certain touch.”
The mountain between the writing in my head and writing for readers is not composed of rock but of something more difficult to penetrate: confidence. I want those writing-related moments of confidence at work to become a bigger part of my life. When that happens, my confidence (and therefore, my happiness) will ascend to new heights.
Last night, my fourth grader had to respond to a passage about how to traverse mountains. The passage talked about how the earliest American settlers didn’t even dare try to cross the Rockies. Eventually, settlers crossed on foot and horseback. Railroads and highways followed.
My journey toward identifying myself more as a writer parallels the passage my son had to read. I have made some inroads into writing outside of the comfort zone tasks I do at work. I have accepted pennies per word to do some paid writing.
My book club has had several authors speak to us. Each one said some variation on write every day, no matter what. One woman was a dental hygienist who arrived at work early every day and wrote two pages (no matter what).
The rocky terrain I must conquer is getting from my regular life to no matter what. I was torn when writing for textbroker.com because I was writing the articles on Sunday afternoons while my children and their friends played in the house. I couldn’t give either my full attention. If I wait and write when everyone is asleep, I wake up crabby and poorly rested, unable to parent fully or be a one hundred percent employee. All the while the title of my favorite career planning book, “Do What You Love and the Money Will Follow” taunts me like the idea of gold in California must have called to the people on the east side of the Rockies.
This is my first step—clearing the brush to cut the trail, laying the tracks, and paving the mountain passes. What awaits? Maybe the juggling of regular life versus writer life is exactly the same on the other side. In the case of the Rockies, the settlers eventually reached the Pacific Ocean, whose boundaries are so expansive there seems to be no end.
Paula Kiger can be reached at opuswsk(at)aol(dot)com.
Author Heidi Raykeil writes about her latest book, Love in the Time of Colic.....
Seven years ago, after the birth of my older daughter, Ramona, I suddenly found my once level libido was missing in action. Where once my husband and I had enjoyed fun nights of sexy naughtiness, now it was just more . . . not. Thus began an ongoing exploration of hanky panky and hokey pokey that began with my anonymous online column at Literary Mama (Sex in the Suburbs) and ended with a memoir about my bumpy path back to the bedroom. While I received great thanks and feedback on my book, Confessions of a Naughty Mommy, I was also quickly bombarded with two questions: “Where’s the how-to manual?” and “When does the guy’s version come out?” Not being a guy—or a doctor (although I like to play one sometimes…)—I figured the jig was up. And then I met bestselling author and therapist Ian Kerner, PH.D. Not only was he a real life sexpert and a man, but a new dad, too. And how can you go wrong with someone who writes a book called: She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman? Within weeks we started collaborating.
In many ways Colic is a sequel to Confessions, a natural consequence of my first book…sort of like my one-year-old daughter Mercy is a natural consequence of finding that lost libido again! As parents and professionals, Ian and I are living this topic every day; we’re dimpled knee deep in it too. Happily, we’ve both learned (each respectively, thank you very much) the hard (pun) way that it really is possible to do the hokey pokey and keep up the hanky panky, or to read the children’s book Hop on Pop, and then actually want to hop on pop. In our book we often reach this conclusion from very different perspectives at times, but what we both agree on is that sex matters . . . a lot. Parents can give their children everything, but nothing is a substitute for parental happiness. And in our opinion, sex is the glue that holds couples together and keeps lovers from simply becoming roommates or co-parents. It’s also the good sticky stuff that dries up if left alone for too long.
This is us on The Today Show last week!
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/26184891/vp/28891751#28891751
You can find out more at http://www.thenaughtymommy.com or http://www.iankerner.com