Literary Mama writing about the many faces of motherhood
Padded Walls

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My baby boy,
muscle and grins,
flails at the end of
his too-little bed;

the bed she gave me as an heirloom,
smiling,
wistfully planning for the children
of the children I haven't
even had yet.

The frilly edges, firm sides,
crisp checks.

He grows.

He smashes the precious bedding
with his knobby toes,
throws his new weight around, thrashing the walls confining his length,
daring it,
willing it to expand.

Nothing has been too little before.
Nothing has been lacking.

There is nothing to do.
Money is tight,
and cribs expensive.

My boy, my only boy,
kicks at the walls
I have made by my failure.


Tracy Lucas is a writer, book editor, longtime stepmom of two, and recent biological mother of one. She and her husband own Four Square Creative, an editing and design firm near Nashville, Tennessee. Two of her previous hats include assistant editor at Good Health for Kids! magazine (now closed) and journalist for the Westview Newspaper. When fighting the muse gets old and the laundry monster wins, she can either be found at her notebook, scribbling furiously, or at her blog, procrastinating with passion.


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